After realising Self, sometimes it feels like laughing due to fact that the truth was so obvious that what was there to seek for months/years. After all, the search leads one to the source which is ordinary awareness – no bells and whistles. Kabir says, “Paani mein meen piyasi, mohe sun sun aave haasi” which means it makes me laugh to hear that fish is thirsty in water. He also says, “Sahaj mile avinasi re” which means that the indestructible is easily found. But to be fair, during seeking it does not look that simple. First doer has to do the seeking and eventually in the final stage when the doer (i.e. the seeker) surrenders to the Self or when the Self annihilates the doer, the truth appears. The doer is like the stick used for stirring the funeral pyre which itself is eventually thrown in the fire.
Category Archives: Self Realisation
Self Realisation & Gravitation
Kabir says, “Kasturi kundal base, mrig dhoondhe ban mahi” which implies that the fragrance is coming from the naval of the deer (musk deer) and it is searching for its source in the forest.
There is huge atmosphere above us due to which there is atmospheric pressure. But we never feel it.
Earth always attracted things towards it and so many people would have seen apple (and other things) falling towards earth. But, it took Newton to actually notice apple falling.
The very fact that something is so available makes it hidden.
Kabir also says, “Khoji hoye turat mili jahoon ek pal ki taalas mein” which means found immediately when searched for a moment.
Newton could, “See” apple falling because he was searching for gravitation.
Self inquiry is a tool by which you say I am not this, not this etc. and eventually are left with just pure awareness which is what you really are. You realise that thoughts are merely appearing in front of you, you are at the background merely watching them. Same is the case with emotions. It is your ignorance of your true nature and the tendencies of the unconscious mind that attach you to thoughts/emotions etc. When attachment is there, instead of watching the thoughts from background, you identify with them.
I Am Awareness – Sudden Realisation
My mind has been contemplating on the teachings of Vedanta, Ramana Maharshi and others and has been going through Self inquiry. A blog post about Self inquiry negating the panchakoshas can be seen here. Ramana Maharshi teaches about doing Self inquiry on, “Who Am I” which also was done.
While contemplating, many thoughts came to my mind, like:
When I say, I am going, here I = body.
When I say, I am eating, here I = body.
When I say, I am exercising, here I = body.
When I say, I am happy, here I = mind.
When I say, I am sad, here I = mind.
When I say, I am solving puzzle, here I = intellect.
When I say, I am in trans, here I = bliss.
So, am I the body or the mind or the intellect or the bliss? Who Am I really? Which is the real me? This means that I am something else that identifies itself with body sometimes, with mind sometimes, with intellect sometimes etc. Intellectually, the answer was known but realisation had not taken place. Suddenly, a realisation came in a flash while reading an article related to Vedanta that I am awareness expressing in different ways. When awareness identifies with body, “I” becomes body. When awareness identifies with mind, “I” becomes mind.
We are Consciousness Proof & Self-Realisation
When Anand is awake, he is a Physicist. Let us call him Anand-P. One day he wakes up in the morning and remembers that he was singer in the dream and that he was giving a live performance but he does not remember when the book that he was reading at bed time fell from his hands and even from the bed. Let us call Anand the singer as Anand-S. On waking it is obviously Anand-P who is associated with, “I” and not Anand-S. When Anand-S was singing, he existed as, “I” who felt real and could see the audience and hear sounds and Anand-P did not exist as, “I”. In fact Anand-P at those moments did not even know that he existed at all. Then how does Anand-P as, “I” on waking know about Anand-S who was a different, “I”? If I do not exist as I then how can I remember witnessing something? This is different from memory of waking state where Anand-P alone exists as, “I” everything else being, “other” and experiences things and remembers some of them. Clearly, something is telling Anand-P about Anand-S. It means that there is a link connecting the two Anands. This connecting link is Self or consciousness which is the real I. This real, “I” is same for both Anands. “I” that is used generally is false “I” attached with ego. One way to realise your true nature is as follows:
Notice your immediate reaction when you suddenly wake up from your dream. Do you feel that it was the same you that was present in the dream at the very instant of waking up before body senses start taking over? If it is the same non-changing I associated with you during this transient state of observation, then the real you must be consciousness. To put it mathematically,
Let t be the instant at which you suddenly wake up while watching dream, if you find that:
Then it implies that,
The above understanding* can open the door to Self-realisation.
*This is called Jnana Yoga, i.e. Self-realisation from knowledge.